KATRINA - OUR LITTLE FREAKSHOW

Does anyone know what today is? National Scrapbooking Day! Yeah for me b/c I got to go crop with Shan and Cleta!!! Also it was Elijah's last soccer game of the season and he scored a goal from right behind midfield. Although I would love to say it was skill that he inherited from his mother, I will not lie it was a complete kick of luck and it shocked everyone especially him! So cute! Well I was writing to tell you about this woman we had to sit with at the crop. I thought we all may just kill her. SHE TALKED NON-STOP FOR EIGHT FREAKING HOURS!!!! Oh poor pitiful me.....so many depressing stories we wondered just how many were true. I got plenty done today but not as much as I needed to because I had to keep getting up to walk around AWAY from her!!!! Man was she ever annoying! To top it off somewhere halfway through the day Shandolynne somehow mentioned my work and then we had to hear about her dog for what seemed like a lifetime!!! Shandolynne had to embellish that my family owns the store and blah blah blah so that Katrina (By the way I already hated that name but now I loath it!) would shift her focus onto me instead of Shandolynne who had actually been acknowledging that she existed. Up to this point I had done fairly well at not speaking to her directly! Now I was forced to act like she existed! "Sweetpea has all the clothing you sell! (Then she describes each and every one!) I am the one who called a couple of times per week wondering when the new OU shirts would be in for little Sweetpea. I am also the one who special ordered the 5 puppy tiaras!" Need I say more! FREAK SHUT UP! She is one of the many reasons why I no longer work on the sales floor but lock myself away to a little office in hopes no freaks find me! I swear Shandolynne if she comes in asking for me by name I will pray DAILY that you have to wipe her ass someday in the hospital and then have to "sit" a shift with her!!!! You know I will! Dreams can come true!

MAJOR CASE OF ROAD RAGE

As if my road rage wasn't bad enough when the power was out and I figured out who in Tulsa and BA actually understands the concept of A 4WAY STOP yesterday was BAD! For those of you who do not know me I have road rage - at least I admit it - now move on! The road rage has calmed considerably since now I ride with a two year old and five year old. I don't have a problem with cussing or flipping the bird since that would be inappropriate I will just follow you and say my peace which I haven't done in a long time. I will also say driving a big SUV has helped to - now I don't care as much because I think people get intimidated and are less likely to piss me off since now I can just run them over! However there are still the few of them that try to act as if they didn't see me - SERIOUSLY - how could you miss me! Well yesterday I took the boys to the mall to see Santa which was not a jolly experience for me anyway then this woman gets mad at me at a for way stop because of HER inability to understand the word STOP! It was clearly my turn since she hadn't even stopped yet but for some reason she decides to honk continuously for several minutes while flipping the bird to my car full of kids! B I could just run her over however I then decide after her persistant ignorance to follow her through the mall parking lot to have a friendly little chat! Well I follow her to her little parking space and basically tell her that it was not my fault she is to ignorant to understand the concept of a 4way stop and she really should reconsider how she acts since 1-it's Christmas, 2- I could have just hit her and plowed her tiny little butt down, 3 - I could've of been a crazy-gun-toting-just listened to my screaming child and a not so jolly Santa for an hour-driving a big car with road rage momma, and 4 - my kids are in the car so it was really not nice of her to flip them the bird....... I went on and on and she looked so scared and shocked and her silence felt great but not as great as her apology to me and them my kids - gotta love it! Not so sure which was a worse influence her idiot behavior and flipping me off for NO reason or my kids seeing me follow her and have a "little chat" - outside of the car so at least they didn't hear me. I must say though trying to explain the "bird" is much harder then telling them I had to correct her for her behavior. THEN I take all the kids home for Martez to tend to while I go to work. On my way to work I get seriously cut off then the person waves to me like I let them over 1 foot in front of me ONLY to come to an immediate stop so they could turn into Wal-mart real fast. As my breaks squeal and my horn is honking and not so nicities are spewing I realize I SERIOUSLY NEED TO GET OUT OF THE CAR AND OUT OF HOLIDAY TRAFFIC BEFORE I KILL SOMEONE!! Merry Christmas to all and to all a safe and please SMART driving night!