The Case of the Attack Weedeater

Spring has sprung! I've noticed people are starting their yardwork this week! This is just a friendly warning to those of you who are attempting yardwork for the first time - it will hurt like hell!!!! It's like I told my husband when he suggested we make yardwork a hobby of ours: THERE IS A REASON IT IS CALLED YARDWORK AND NOT YARDHOBBY!!!! The weedeater is not your friend the first five times out!! My own weedeater tried to eat my legs - no joke! Ask anyone who saw me last summer! You see my VERY dear friend Melanie and my sister FAILED to tell me to wear pants until I got used to using the weedeater and then they made fun of my legs all summer! I think they just liked hearing my stories personally! I had seen my sister mow and use the weedeater time and time again wearing shorts without fail! I had never mowed or used a weedeater before in my life before this past summer! My parents wouldn't let me for fear I would cut a foot off when I was younger. Why would they ever think that? Then both my brothers owned lawn care businesses so I never needed too. But this was my year to learn I wanted to learn it all and I guess I learned the hard way!! DO NOT I REPEAT DO NOT wear shorts until you have become accustomed to the weedeater!!! It is not your friend! The first time it took me forever to keep the stupid thing running and it wouldn't advance the line. This freaking machine spit weeds at my legs going about 10000 mph! It hurt at first then I think my legs just went numb because I no longer felt anything which wasn't a good thing. I would have quit much sooner if I knew how my legs would have looked! It was a bloody mess! The second time- and yes I was an idiot and wore shorts again- the stupid thing spit out the end of the line at my foot at a rate of 10000 mph and did I mention I was a complete idiot and just wore flip flops!! That is all I wear in summer - flip flops. I am addicted to them! Yea if I could have cut my foot off I would have but it would have cost way too much! (That's funny if you read the previous blog!) So Elijah who was 4 at the time sees the bloody mess called my legs and feet and suggests this "Mommy maybe next time you should have someone who knows how to use the weedeater do it!" Out of the mouths of babes! He obviously didn't know how bad my foot hurt and how angry I was at the time so I just said Thanks Elijah go get mommy some towels to wipe the blood. Now I was more determined than ever! I was going to master this thing called yarkwork even if it killed me in the process but I sure prayed it wouldn't! Okay so the third time I wore pants and thought I was getting the hang of all this and getting obsessive about the line between the lawn and the sidewalk. It had to be deep and perfect! It got easier each time until I decided it was entirely too hot to do yardwork in Oklahoma wearing pants (got that idea once I felt like I was going to pass out)! Now that would suck - fainting while weedeating!! Ok so I was a pro now and back to wearing shorts and my faithful flip flops while doing yardwork. I had some grass thrash marks but so far so good. Then the @$@#@%#$ machine decided to hurl a giant rock at my thigh at you guessed it 10000mph! You can only imagine the pain if it has happened to you! So in pain and shock I move the weedeater into the cable line along the fence but released the button at the thought of no cable! LMAO! Needless to say it gets better with each time but be careful it is not a toy! And for all of you who have friends and family that would rather laugh at the outcome than warn you before hand like me - Don't wear shorts or flip flops until you know how to operate the weedeater successfulyl! Oh yeah and on some mowers did you know you have to turn the self propel on it isn't automatic. And a self propelled mower is a lot heavier than a normal mower if the self propel thingy isn't on! Well that's a whole other story! And no one told me that either not even my husband so he does all the mowing now I stick to my trusty friend the weedeater!! Ha! I have learned to enjoy yardwork or at least the pretty outcome! I still love you Mel or should I say Megan because Melanie wouldn't do that right!!