Friday, June 08, 2007

MY PANIC ATTACK

This can not possibly be happening to me! Why? What are the odds? I've never even talked to anyone else who has experienced this trauma. This could cause me to breakdown soon. It happened again! I am not lying, exaggerated and in no possible way is this humorous to me!! If you read my blog you know this happened last year then again a couple of nights ago and it happened again! I am in TOTAL disbelief! At least I have a witness this time so they can't all say I am crazy! About 15 minutes ago I was relaxing watching So You Think You Can Dance amazed by the dancing abilities of the young dancers wishing I could do the same when I spotted a spider. It was not as large as they have been so I took a deep breath took off my flip flop and hit it. Oh dear Lord above are you just punishing me for something by constantly using my fear of spiders!!! IT HAPPENED AGAIN! If this has happened to anyone other than me please let me know so I can not feel so alone and weird. Little tiny baby spiders flew everywhere! I was hitting them with the flip flop but the little bit of air from me frantically swatting the shoe was sending the tiny things in all directions. I screamed about five times for Martez - nothing! I decided to go get the windex and when I returned I sprayed the babies and when I went to spray the momma spider she was GONE! All I can say is !@$#%$^!#$#!@%^!!!! Right about then when I am in full panic mode - looking everywhere, hopping around, shaking and breathing extremely fast! This has never happened to me before but I think my thoughts of the spiders taking over no matter how irrational are becoming overwhelming! This just doesn't happen to anyone especially not THREE times!!!!! Seriously! Martez walks in from locking our outside gate and I went in to hysterical mode and made him move all furniture around the area until we found her, killed her and the rest of her demon spawn. The exterminator is getting my call 1st thing in the morning because my next Friday appointment is NOT soon enough and if they can't come tomorrow then I will call every exterminator in town until I find one that can. If I don't find one who can come tomorrow I may need to search for a doctor who does house calls for heavy sedation in the obviously high possibility it happens to me again!!!! I am not going to say it can't happen again because I said that the first and second time and it still happened a third time so I am keeping my mouth shut. That reminds me - I begin thinking each time this happens that if I hadn't killed each one of those momma spiders and the hundreds of little spiderlings they would be EVERYWHERE just multiplying uncontrollably. Which then in turn brings me to the awful fact my friend Melanie told me awhile back - did you know humans occasionally swallow spiders in their sleep and it adds up over your lifetime? How evil is she to tell me that?!?!!? Imagine how many spiders I have swallowed in the past year alone living in the "Spider Breeding Grounds"! @!$!#%$@!@ Well I am going to brush my teeth no telling how many spider guts are there from accidentally biting down in my sleep then I am going to duct tape my mouth shut and go to bed! Right about now is where Melanie being her sweet self comments me to tell me "Don't worry if you tape your mouth shut they'll just go in your ears or up your nose!" So thank you Mel in advance for the thoughtful comment I know you will send me!!!

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