Tuesday, December 09, 2008

THOUGHTS UNDER THE INFLUENCE AT THE DENTIST

So I go to the dentist on Friday to get two very old and cracked fillings removed then refilled. I don't get nervous going to the dentist and I don't have a problem with needles BUT I can NOT stand the numbing shots in the mouth. I think they are so incredibly painful!! The nurse could tell I was nervous and I told her I was only nervous about the shots in my mouth so she asked if I wanted "gas". Umm let me think..YES!! The gas was turned on, attached to my nose and I was off to lala land! It is crazy the thoughts that were in my head but even crazier is wondering if you are actually funny or if it is the laughing gas. I laid there for what seemed like forever and my mind was going a million mph while my eyes occassionally closed and the eyeballs rolled around probably very little but they felt like something off a cartoon. Oh the thoughts and how I cracked myself up! First of all the thoughts were "is this actually working or am I just naturally this funny". Then I began to wonder if they forgot about me. I proceeded to make the gas mask a little more comfortable when I discovered it was an unusually tight fit. After I noticed this, I thought to myself "oh there is NO way this would fit on my husband's nose"......I love him dearly but hey he does have a large nose.......wait I am seriously laughing while typing.....then I remembered my friend Zane from college. I remembered how he had a larger nose and was trying to use those Biore nose strips.....well you can figure the rest out but it was so freaking funny.....hold on laughing again. They came in to check on me and laughed at everything I said which again brought the thoughts wow am I that funny or are they humoring me because they know I am on "gas". Hmm...the floating sensation began shortly after this and I was so relaxed. I began to wonder if I could ask for "gas" to go for those oh so stressful moments. Not a druggie in fact I am terrible at even remembering to take medicine but I felt SO relaxed and the entire world was at peace in my little reclining chair with no noise except my racing thoughts! I then began to wonder if I in fact looked fatter than my normal fat self. You know with the drugs and relaxation I could no longer suck anything in and all muscles that would hold in any fat at all were mush. I wondered exactly how many chins I had in my leaned back no muscle control state. I wanted a mirror but thought a complete breakdown about being fat probably would not be the best idea in this moment. Still wondering if they forgot about me but enjoying total relaxation and keeping my eyes open started to become impossible...nap would be great! I wondered if I would remember all my funny "under the influence" thoughts so I could blog about them ~ how sick is that! I then began to laugh at how crazy that idea was as I ran each funny thought over and over again in my head as if to memorize it for a blog post! No such luck but I was hilarious I tell you! I totally cracked myself up! They came in and the Dentist says, "Wow I think she had a little too much gas she is pretty out of it and about to fall asleep!" I was slurring to say the least. His directions like "turn this way a little, open wider, if you feel pain let me know (yeah right I couldn't feel a thing)" took a few minutes to register after floating through my head trying to make sense of anything he said and wondering if he was talking to me or the nurse ~ lol. He again said, "Let's turn the gas down. She is barely functioning and about to be knocked out!" I just laughed. This is where the thoughts of the movie Taxi came into play. I cracked up thinking about when he is stuck between two cars and trying to get out OR when they were trapped in a garage filled with laughing gas. I would occassionally let out a laugh then be told to hold my tongue still while they laughed AT me. Dude I was seriously out of it!! Then I heard his stomach growl and said "Are you hungry?". Now take into account that I said this with my mouth so wide open that the corners of my mouth are slit open now and various metal dental tools in my mouth and he still understood me!! How cool is he! I know that is he talks to people in this state all day but how good is he! They kept laughing at me so I must be funny OR maybe I just need small doses of nitrous to go!! They should put that stuff into an inhaler ~ how cool would that be! Then dull, boring, flat people could be funny for a day too! Can we vote on this idea? Very long story short I was done in 90 minutes but had to be given extra oxygen because I was definitely NOT myself afterward. Off to my Mom's house I went to pick up Isaiah where I fell asleep for a LONG time!

3 comments:

I would love to hear from you! Leave a comment please!